Things Are Not That Great Right Now. . . and What Shall We Learn from That?

 We're living through very difficult times right now.  Most of that has to do with the pandemic and the fear of an early, painful death that will definitely take many of us, and that's a very real fear to have--no one knows just who's going to contract the virus, and we don't know just who's going to die and who's going to recover.   So we're living with our fears from day to day, and after many months of doing so, it's getting tiring.  Most of us are experiencing some form of fatigue or another, to varying degrees.

Add to this the fact that many people have lost their jobs or are experiencing times of want because their incomes have dropped significantly.  Add to this also the fact that many people have lost loved ones in one of the worst ways possible--they've died alone in hospital rooms, unable to have any visitors to comfort them because of the risk of spreading the virus even further.  And should we add the incredibly divisive and hate-filled election that we've just experienced in this country?  And the isolation that we've all had to experience, not being able to spend time with our loved ones as much as we normally would?  We can't even go over to friends' houses for a cup of coffee any more, or invite someone over for dinner, as long as we're trying to be truly safe.

Personally, one of the most important things that's affecting me is the disappointment that I feel when I see people who don't care enough for their fellow human beings to try even in the slightest ways to keep them safe from the virus, refusing to wear masks, refusing to social distance, even threatening and mocking people who are trying to be safe.  The disappointment I feel is profound, even if I do recognize that these people are coming from a place of fear that I simply don't feel, so I can't truly understand it.


There are not so many lessons in glad times.
Adversity is by far the better teacher.
Adversity will be part of almost all our lives.
So it is not in escaping adversity,
but in answering it, that our character is defined.
-Christopher Warren


We are living through possibly the most stressful period of most of our lives.  I do realize that many people have gone through more difficult times, experiencing significant health problems, times at war as soldiers, being refugees from countries that are too dangerous to live in, and many, many other forms of adversity that most of us will not experience.  But as far as global issues are concerned, our current times have dealt us all significant blows and kept us stressed out for a very long time.

The question is this, of course:  What are we going to do with this adversity?  How are we going to answer it?  How can we not just recognize some of the lessons that it's bringing us, but actually learn those lessons and use them to help us to make our lives better?  What can we learn from the isolation that we're experiencing?  What can we learn from the people who refuse to take any safety measures to protect themselves and others from the virus?  What can we learn from the "other side" of the political spectrum, those people who disagree with us and call us names and mock us just because of that disagreement?

I'm telling my students (most of whom are high school freshmen) that what they're learning from their experiences these days is going to make them much more resilient than their predecessors ever were, and they're learning this lesson at a very young age.  When they get to college or start their careers and certain challenges arise, they're going to be able to say, "Heck, this is nothing compared to the year I spent doing school from home."

This is something that I can feel myself, because when many things happen to me, I say to myself, "This is nothing compared to the Army."  It's all a matter of perspective, in some ways, and if we use difficult times to learn valuable lessons, life can become very rich, indeed.  Of course, my four years in the Army were voluntary, but that fact doesn't change the reality of the situation--they were difficult, challenging years that taught me a lot about myself, life, and living.  I finished my service as a more patient person who was more appreciative of many of the things that we tend to take for granted in life, such as the ability to choose whatever clothes I wish to wear in the morning.

So what can we learn from these times of adversity?  First of all, I think that we can learn about the values of isolation and solitude, even if our isolation is rather forced--and perhaps because the isolation is forced.  Most of us would not choose to spend so much time alone in our homes, even though that time can be very healthy.  When we learn that we don't need constant affirmation from others, we learn to be satisfied with ourselves and what we do.  A day spent alone at home can help us to regroup and recharge, rather than putting ourselves in situations that cause us to be pulled in many different directions by the people we spend time with.  Most of us would have given up after a few days of isolation, but the extended version of isolation that many of us are having to deal with allows us to get more used to it more, and to start seeing aspects of it that are more positive, aspects that don't make themselves obvious until weeks or months have passed.

We can also practice compassion.  Personally, I strongly dislike wearing a mask, but I know that I wear one to protect other people from me, so to speak, so I wear one whenever I'm in a situation in which I have contact with others.  This is especially important to me because I teach at a high school, and I never have any idea what kinds of situations my students have been in.  I know that even if I contract the virus, I may be asymptomatic, or I may be in the stage in which I'm still showing no symptoms, but am contagious, and that mask that I'm wearing is supposed to keep the virus that I'm exhaling in my breath from spreading a long distance.

I also want to learn about understanding other people's feelings during these trying times.  People are nervous, afraid, hesitant, defiant, angry, and many other things these days--and it's super easy to judge them for those feelings.  But rather than judge them, I want to try to understand them.  After all, my feelings may seem odd to other people, too, and I would very much appreciate it if someone else took the time to understand where I'm coming from rather than judging me outright.  If I can understand other people's feelings and not try to fix their problems for them, I may be able to be a good listener and help someone else to cope with some of the negative emotions that they're going through.

We can also learn from watching other people's mistakes.  We can see the outbreaks that result from people refusing to adhere to some of our new-found mandates such as mask-wearing and social distancing.  I've always been one to learn from other people's negative actions and results, and now we have a chance to witness a whole bunch of mistakes from a wide variety of people--and hopefully put those lessons into practice, either now or later.  Personally, I hope that the number of deaths from silly decisions is minimal--if I'm going to get this virus, I hope that I get it in a way that was unforeseeable or unavoidable, not as a result of doing something that I really know I shouldn't be doing.

Mostly, though, I want to learn how to love stronger, more deeply, more consistently.  My reactions should always be loving reactions, even in those situations in which "tough love" is called for.  I don't want to let anger get in the way of my love, or frustration or judgment.  I want to learn how to share my love in the most positive ways possible during some of the most difficult times that we've gone through.  If I can learn to do so, and do so well, then many other people can benefit from the love I'm able to share with them.

How do you make it through adversity?  How are you making it through the Covid pandemic?  Do you feel strong and healthy and balanced?  Or do you feel weakened and out of balance?  Adversity strikes us all sometime, and this time it's hitting us all at the same time--so let's do what we can to learn from this pandemic and the ways that people are responding to it.  If we can learn these very important lessons, then we're going to be much more effective at loving and understanding our fellow people on this planet.  So let's try to figure out how to learn our lessons and learn them well so that we can put them into practice as soon as possible!

See more on adversity on Living Life Fully.

Me and My Spirit

That's how I used to see this concept:  I was I, and my spirit was somehow separate from me.  The thinking me, after all, couldn't be the spiritual me.  I was a person who was stuck to the ground by gravity, who was a part of the world that finds itself on this planet, but my spirit was something else, something ethereal, immortal, unlimited and free.

Boy, does that seem strange now.  Now I realize that I am that spirit, that I've hitched a ride in a particular body for a certain amount of time.  I'm not "separate" from my spirit at all--rather, I am the spirit, and I am not simply this body that's here on earth for a short while.

I had a very hard time understanding this idea.  My logical and rational mind, after all, likes to feel that it's in charge, and that it does a pretty good job of making sense of the world and my place in it.  The truth is, though, that it really doesn't.  It's kind of like I put my mind in charge of my life only to find out that it's not competent enough to be in charge.  The mind seems to be quite well suited to be a very good servant, but very poorly suited to be our master.

I do recognize the strengths of the mind.  I'm very grateful for scientists and engineers whose minds help us to develop vaccines and bridges and microwave ovens and airplanes.  My mind helps me to distinguish between lies and the truth, and it helps me to recognize dangers and pitfalls that lie ahead of me in any endeavor I may make.  My mind is a wonderful thing, and I appreciate it a great deal.  Without it, my time in this body would be unbearable, to say the least.

The mind, though, is very limited.  Our eyes are fantastic pieces of work, but they can only see 0.0035 percent of the light spectrum.  Our ears are the same, hearing only a portion of the present sounds in our world.  Likewise, the brain can process many, many things--but it is limited in what it can do.

Our brains, for example, can read about love, study love, interpret love, and process conditions of love, but we don't love from our brains.  We love from our hearts and our spirits, and life is better that way.  Love isn't a negotiation--if it were, it would be in the realm of our brains.  Compassion doesn't come from analyzing data and reaching conclusions--rather, it, too, is a part of who we are, a product of our spirits.  People have tried to think through love and compassion and come up with definitions and explanations of them, but those definitions and explanations always fall short of the true nature of the concepts.  Our minds simply aren't expansive enough to deal with such amazing ideas.

And that's fine with me.  The important part to me is that I've finally realized that there is a difference between who I am and who I've always thought I am.  There is great value in allowing myself to shine as a spirit, as opposed to keeping my spirit subjugated to my reason.

When I allow my spirit to shine, I'm much more patient, for as a spirit I understand the fleetingness of life on this planet and the expansiveness of eternity.

When I allow my spirit to shine, I'm able to deal with life from a position of love and compassion and hope and trust, for as a spirit I don't need to come up with logical reasons to show and feel these things.

I'm able to relax more, for as a spirit I am not in a hurry, and I know that things will come to pass in their own time, as the flower blooms in its own time, not on any schedule.

I can deal with loss more easily, for as a spirit I understand that the words "This, too, shall pass" apply to virtually everything.  When things do pass, I may grieve, but I also understand that I'm to celebrate having experience it while it was here rather than to focus on the fact that it's no longer here.

I can be a beacon to others who see my peace of mind and peace of heart and would like to experience, but who haven't yet been taught the dangers of materialism and addiction to work and money.

I can function in the world without necessarily being part of the world--the negative parts, at least.  I can go to work without feeling fear of being caught up in the so-called rat race, and without dreading so many of the truly trivial elements that so often dominate the workplace.  I can earn my living without contributing to the greed and avarice and heartlessness and meanness of the world.

I can love unconditionally, knowing that others will benefit from that love, even if only slightly, depending upon how ready they are to accept love from others.

I can be more understanding of my fellow human beings, for as a spirit I know and understand the struggles that they're going through trying to get in touch with their own spirits, their own selves, even as they're pulled more and more deeply into the material, superficial world that's been created around us.

There are, of course, many other benefits of allowing ourselves to just be, on the level of our spirit.  I fully suspect that the longer I truly allow spirit to shine through, I'll come to know many benefits that I never even suspected existed.  It's not easy to go through life on a spiritual level--after all, we've been conditioned to see the world as a result of our intellects, and that conditioning is very difficult to put back in its place.  But it's worth the effort.  As I get closer and closer to truly allowing myself to shine constantly as a spirit (and I think I've only come one or two very short steps so far), my life gets simpler and easier.  I understand many things much better, and as that happens, my tension levels shrink significantly.

If we try to get through life using our intellect and reason as our sole guides to life, we're bound to live limited and rather tedious lives.  When we allow ourselves to shine as the spirits that we are, though, life becomes something more, something very special, just as our experiences, too, become much more special and much more loving.

Is More Love on the Way?

One of the hopes that most people have these days, especially with the results of our recent election (that the vast majority of us recognize as valid), is that our country will now experience more love and hope and compassion in our future than we've experienced during the last four years.  Our last four years have been truly devoid of national leaders who put compassion and caring anywhere in their agenda, and many people in our country now feel completely disenfranchised, and threatened every single day.  They're threatened because of their race, their gender, their sexuality, their lifestyle preferences--you name it.  The outgoing administration has done everything within its power to marginalize anyone who doesn't agree with them, anyone who disapproves of them, anyone who's slightly different than they are.  And while I'm very glad that this extremely negative and damaging administration is about to leave, I'm hoping that we all realize that while a change of leaders may make some difference in the way things are, the biggest changes are going to have to come from us in our own individual lives if they're to be lasting changes that affect as many people as possible in positive ways.

Of course, it will be wonderful to have a leader who models compassion and unity rather than anger and hatred and divisiveness.  For the last four years I've been waiting in vain to see some sort of compassion come from the White House, but my wait has been in vain.  There's been a lot of action, but the vast majority of the acts have benefited only those people close to the administration, and those people wealthy enough to benefit.

The decline in the quality of life in the United States has accelerated significantly over the last four years, and it doesn't show too many signs of getting better (https://www.usnews.com/news/best-countries/articles/2020-09-11/a-global-anomaly-the-us-declines-in-annual-quality-of-life-report).  When we keep people down, when we don't allow them to have hope of better times ahead, it becomes very difficult for those people to actually spread positive energy in the world, and it seems that fewer people are willing to share their love and kindness with the downtrodden these days.  We're more isolated from each other--and COVID certainly hasn't helped--and much less willing to knock on a neighbor's door to offer our encouragement or assistance.

But if love and compassion are to gain a foothold again, it's up to each of us individually to share what we have with others, without condition.  And I'm not talking about material things, though those can be helpful, too.  Rather, I'm talking about the encouraging word to someone who's having troubles.  I'm talking about a smile and a kind word in response to someone else's rudeness.  I'm talking about a compliment for something done well, or something done better than it's normally done ("That's a good improvement" can be much more helpful than "That's still not right").

But it's also important that we keep our eyes open for the bad things that are happening, to be aware of the difficulties that others are facing.  We still live in a world that is divided and that is facing an incredible amount of anger and antipathy between sibling and sibling, parent and child, friend and friend.  There are many people who are trying to change laws and policies so that they may gain materially.  There are still many people who look down on other because of race, religion, social status, or any number of similar reasons.  We must keep our eyes and our hearts open so that we can recognize the negative things and people in the world so that we can counter what they're doing with a little bit of love of our own.

The world, of course, will go on just fine without us.  It will go on fine no matter what we do, no matter how we treat others.  But we know that the world is in need of positive people, of positive energy, of energy that is focused on unity and togetherness rather than division.  And we can contribute to that unity, to that positive energy, with very little effort on our parts.  My original question was simply, "Is there more love on the way?"  Many people feel that now that we've elected a certain leader, there will be more love and compassion in our country, and I have to say that I don't disagree with that conclusion.

That said, though, I also know that the only way that we can guarantee that there's more love on the way in this world of ours is for each of us to dedicate ourselves to contributing to this world of ours.  The only way that I can know for sure if there's more love in this world this evening than there was yesterday is to put some love out there, no matter how little.  It's a challenge to do so, but at the very least, it's something positive in this world full of negativity.  So my goal is to be someone who contributes love to this world and to the people in my own little world, for that's the only way that I can be sure that the amount of love has grown recently, and that there's now more positive energy in the world than there was yesterday.

And if you were to do the same, then we'd both know that at the very least, two of us have contributed to the love of the world.  And there aren't too many goals to strive for that are more worthwhile than that.