Christmas Wishes (In Today's World)

What is Christmas? It is tenderness for the past,
courage for the present, hope for the future.
It is a fervent wish that every cup may overflow
with blessings rich and eternal, and that every
path may lead to peace.

Agnes M. Pharo


Somehow, Christmas has always been a time when people like to think about other people, to think about what it means to be a kind, compassionate, caring human being who does good for other people without worrying about their nationalities, their skin color, their sexual orientation, their native language, or any of those other things that so many people lean on to justify their biases and prejudices.  Unfortunately, though, so many people in our world have allowed themselves to fall into the trap of allowing their biases and prejudices to dominate their world-view, and they've allowed those things to also dominate their decision-making processes, so we live in a world that's divided, among people who fear each other more than they love each other, who hate each other for no real reason, and who don't trust each other even on the most basic of levels.

But here we are--no matter how we feel about the world today or the ways that people are treating each other, we're in the middle of it all, right here, right now.  and realizing this truth calls us more than ever to be true to who we are, to our principles, to whatever ethical codes that we hold dear.  Do we feel that human beings should show kindness and compassion to each other?  Then we need to be showing kindness and compassion ourselves--and perhaps trying to show more of each in a world in which it seems that both qualities are in short supply.

Do we feel that there needs to be more love and hope in our world?  Then we need to start with ourselves, and make sure that we keep love in mind when we deal with others--we can't preach love while our own hearts and spirits aren't in a loving state.  And it's not easy to maintain a loving state when we see so many awful things being done to others who are helpless to defend themselves.

Christmas, of course, is a holiday celebrating the birth of Jesus, even though his birthday was likely not in December.  And if the holiday is about honoring Jesus--religious beliefs or preferences aside--then it seems to me that we should be thinking about things that Jesus taught.  After all, we're all encouraged to think about civil rights on Martin Luther King's birthday, and freedom on Lincoln's birthday, etc.  But because of the historic truth of the "Christian" churches committing all sorts of crimes against humanity, the teachings of the man take a back seat to the myth of the man's words that have been warped by religious leaders who have been doing little more than trying to justify their own awful deeds by presenting Jesus' words in ways that will make them seem to be following those very words, when in fact they're violating the man's teachings.

So my main Christmas wish would be that the people who believe that Jesus was the Messiah could start to actually understand what Jesus taught, and follow his true teachings, rather than simply listening to other people who are presenting their interpretations of the man's words.  Perhaps Jesus could come back for a few months and start an online course that he could make mandatory for anyone who calls themselves Christian, a course that will spell out explicitly what it means to follow the words of a man who taught kindness and compassion and love for one's neighbor.  If this would happen, MANY politicians would lose their next chance to be reelected, and MANY pastors and priests would be out of a job, taking them out of positions in which they influence people.

And that may be my only wish because I think it would be a great start.  If this were to happen, so much of the hypocrisy and discrimination in the world would cease, and we might not need anything more than this to create a kinder and gentler world.  I think I'll hold off on any other wishes until I see how this one turns out. . . .

'Tis the Season (In Today's World)

For me, the spirit of Christmas is about
letting the loving but messy little rituals
become just as important as the solemn
and graceful ones.  It's about making
room for everyone.   -Ann Michael


It's going to be difficult this year, I think, to celebrate Christmas without having the thought in the back of my mind that celebrations are somehow inappropriate or out of place.  After all, the world is going through so many challenges now that make things seem almost hopeless.  The war that Russia started in the Ukraine drags on, while people are still dying.  The conflicts between Israelis and Palestinians continue to claim lives, while militants in African nations have killed over 20,000 people this year.  The US is continuing to kill people on boats near Venezuela, and is indicating that war may be imminent.  Millions of families have been devastated by poverty and illegal ICE detentions and layoffs.  The list could go on for the rest of this page, it seems.

But so this is Christmas.  'Tis the season of peace and love and joy, or at least it's supposed to be for Christians.  Unfortunately, many Christians in the United States have become radicalized, and they've warped the main messages that Jesus taught:  Love one another, help one another, be kind to one another.  This new dynamic most definitely does diminish the message of Christmas, unless we're able to separate those people who have adopted radical and inappropriate interpretations of Christian teaching and the Bible from the holiday itself, which can still stand as a beacon of hope and love and even joy.

My Christmas is going to be separate from the radical, hate-filled messages of the people who aren't able to separate their politics from their religion.  If I'm to celebrate Christmas properly, then I need to focus on love and compassion, on others and their needs.  And I need to make sure that I take advantage of my personal situations in order to make the most of them--I'm not going to be able to celebrate love if all I do is focus on the negative things going on in the world.  I don't want to forget them, but I also can't let them bring me down.  If I were in a terrible situation myself, I would want people who weren't in the same situation as I to go on with their lives, and to live fully and take advantage of all they have available to them.

Which is not to say that I would fully understand someone who decides to "cancel" Christmas in solidarity with those who aren't able to celebrate because of life situations that have been pushed upon them by others.  Would the lack of celebration for just one year be a sign of giving up completely, of letting the world get us down?  Absolutely not.  It could be a very strong message to others that our commitment to other human beings is strong and that the well-being of others is just as important to me as my own well-being.  I know that there are people who are deciding to do just this, and I understand completely where they're coming from--they're not letting the world situations get them down; rather, they're standing strong in the face of those situations and doing what they feel is right, in their own way.

We're going to celebrate, because much of the rest of the world is going to celebrate.  We want to stand together with the people in the world who want to celebrate the ideas of love and kindness and giving and compassion.  I'll enjoy the lights and the music, and I'll give gifts to as many people as I can to show that I'm thinking about them and that they mean a lot to me.

Life is difficult right now for many, many people.  Life is difficult for me at the moment, but I still have things much, much better than millions of other people do.  And even in difficult times, I wouldn't want people who are in better situations to avoid celebrations that are legitimately worth celebrating.

So here's to celebrating a Christmas during which we focus on loving one another, and healing one another.  A Christmas during which we share kindness and caring for one another, and during which we celebrate the wonderful potential we all have to help others in this life, and to give all that we can to the other people who share this planet with us.  I wish you a very merry Christmas, and I hope that we all can work together to bring more love into the world in the hope that the love will drive out the hatred and fear and anger.

Adding to the Positive (in Today's World)

The world needs huge positive energy to fight against
the negative forces. Go to the center of your inner begin
and generate that positive energy for the welfare
of humanity.    -Amit Ray


"The world needs."  Yes, it does.  And where is this positive energy going to come from, if it doesn't come from us?  Who is going to contribute to the world in positive ways if we don't?  Sometimes, though, it seems like an overwhelming task, something immense to ask of us when we're doing all we can just to get by.  How can my tiny bit of positive energy affect the world as a whole?  How can my optimistic words or actions help those people who are suffering greatly right now?

And because it's very easy to feel this way, to think that our thoughts or actions can't be helpful on a grand scale, we give up, and we simply plod through life, beaten down by the sheer overwhelmingness of the awful things that are happening to other people.

But the important thing to remember is that our positive actions don't have to affect the entire world.  They don't have to bring hope to millions of people.  We live in a large world, yes, but we also live in our own little worlds, surrounded by the people who share that world with us.  My world doesn't even consist of the town or city I live in--it consists of me and the people with whom I have contact, one way or another.  My obligation to the world is simply to do the best I can to help to expand positive energy in my world, and then trust that it will ripple out from there.

If I encourage a student today, then she may go home and do something positive for her little brother (whom I shall never meet), or her parents, or another student at school, simply because she feels more positive now.  And then, it's very possible that her positive action for her sister's sake will make her brother feel very good, and that he'll do something positive for someone else.

If I compliment someone who works in a store or a restaurant or in a public service position, then there's always the chance that the person will then "pass it on," complimenting or helping someone else in some way.

We're talking about ripples, about waves that expand from a central point and grow larger as they go, turning still water into moving water, just for a few moments.  We don't have to change the world--we just need to start a ripple, turn on one light switch, light one candle.  You can choose your own metaphor.

The world needs positive energy, especially during these rather dark days when people are reacting more to their fear than to their love, more to their anger than to their compassion.  And it's got to start somewhere, or it will never start at all.

Let it begin with us--you and me.  We can't change the world in one fell swoop, but we can contribute to the positive energy that this world so badly needs.

We Really Do Need Hope (in Today's World)

If we were logical, the future would be bleak indeed.  But we
are more than logical.  We are human beings, and we
have faith, and we have hope, and we can work.   -Jacques Cousteau


In some ways, I've come close to losing my hope these days--and why wouldn't I?  In my country, the system of checks and balances that our government is supposedly based on has crumbled, and is completely failing the country now.  We have politicians who, because of superiority of numbers, are able to do virtually anything they please, without facing any consequences, for they've seen the flaws in the system and rather than fix those flaws, they exploit them, to the harm of all.  I'm watching people violate Constitutional law constantly while facing absolutely NO repercussions for doing so.  I'm seeing families torn apart while people pat each other on the back for having done so--even though no one in those families has done anything to deserve that fate.  It's depressing, and it's disheartening.  And to be completely honest, I believe it's all quite evil.

But I do hope.  I have the hope that things will turn eventually.  I don't know what it will take--a general or two to finally stand up and fulfill their vows to uphold the Constitution?  A group of people elected in the mid-terms who can turn the tide and help to keep the rule of law from being violated constantly?  I know in my heart, unfortunately, that we face the prospect of the entire country being sucked into an abyss of corruption and violation of law, but sometimes things have to be broken down completely in order to be rebuilt better.

My hope is that better times are ahead, especially for our young people, who don't deserve the obstacles that we've put in front of them by simply accepting all that happens in our government and in the business world.  I have hope that we can allow our humanity to shine in the ways that we spread kindness and love and compassion.  I have hope that we can work together, rather than yell at each other across a great divide.  I have hope that we shall overcome, and not submit.  I have hope that Love will find a way.

Life without Busyness

If work and leisure are soon to be subordinated to this
one utopian principle--absolute busyness--then utopia
and melancholy will come to coincide:  an age without conflict
will dawn, perpetually busy--and without consciousness.

Gunther Grass


I think we may be near the age that Gunther warned about, if we're not there already.  I've known plenty of people in my life who have been so extremely addicted to working that they hardly do anything else at all, and they rarely if ever have time available to spend with other people--even their own families.  And if they're satisfied with the results they're seeing, then who am I to tell them that what they're doing is harmful?  It's very common to watch other people make drastic mistakes that will harm them in the long term, but be unable to convince them that a change would help them because they see the world only in the short term.

One of my goals of the last couple of decades has been to not be too busy to enjoy life.  I didn't want to get so caught up in work and tasks around the house and other obligations that I wasn't able to do things that I enjoy, and spend time with people whose company I enjoy.  I found that it was relatively easy to do so, for it took some simple decision-making that was rather painless.  Personally, I like being a helpful person, but at time in my past I've been somewhat too helpful, and lost some valuable opportunities for some very nice experiences because I committed myself to help someone else.  Interestingly enough, whenever I've helped others, it's always seemed that they didn't really need much help at all, or that they could have easily done the job themselves.  My presence wasn't at all necessary, and my time could have been much better spent elsewhere.

Of course, that's not always true.  There are plenty of legitimate opportunities to help people and organizations that truly do need our help.  What I've learned, though, is that that person doesn't have to be me.  There are plenty of other people who are able to help just as well--or even better--than I can.  And if someone else is doing the work, I have time to do something that can be reinvigorating, rejuvenating, for me.

We face a lot of pressure to make ourselves busy meeting other people's needs.  Many other people have gotten very good at getting others to do their work for them, or at least a part of it.  The boss at work can pressure a subordinate to take on extra tasks; the person in a relationship with us can manipulate or guilt-trip us into spending our time on things we don't necessarily want to be doing.

Our task as human beings who are responsible for our own well-being is to make sure that we don't overextend or overcommit ourselves.  We need to be sure that we don't sabotage the chances we have to be happy and to live life on our own terms, rather than spending our precious time on tasks that we take on because others ask us to do so.  Personally, I'm working on this right now because I just retired, and I want to make sure that any time ahead of me is going to be spent wisely, with a balance between living and working, being busy doing tasks and being busy taking care of myself (see below).  No matter where we are in life, it may be a good idea to step back from the busyness and make sure that what we're spending our time on is fulfilling and healthy, and that we don't get so busy doing things for others that we spend no time doing things for ourselves.  Because we're each worth it.


I lied and said I was busy.
I was busy;
but not in a way most people understand.
I was busy taking deeper breaths.
I was busy silencing irrational thoughts.
I was busy calming a racing heart.
I was busy telling myself I am okay.
Sometimes, this is my busy -
and I will not apologize for it.

Brittin Oakman

What Does Christmas "Spirit" Mean?--A Paragraph a Day

I love the idea of Christmas Spirit, but I'll be the first to admit that I don't know what the term actually means.  It's probably one of those things for which we have the standard kind of answer--"it means something different for everyone"--but it would be nice if we could define it and understand it clearly.  Not because I'm the type of person who needs and wants to have everything catalogued and defined according to a certain set of criteria, but because it seems to be such a positive concept, one that can bring us true joy if we knew how to access it, or harness it, or adopt it.  After all, the Spirit of Christmas would have to include a love of giving, and it would have to include a love for virtually everyone.  It would exclude everything like greed and selfishness, and it wouldn't have anything to do with judgment or bias.  I think that if I want to go out and model the Spirit of Christmas, I would have kind words for everyone I met, and I would be as generous as I possibly could be, given my means.  I wouldn't treat others with harshness, and I wouldn't make them feel that I didn't approve of them for any reason.  If I were to model Christmas Spirit, I would listen carefully when others talked, and I would encourage them as much as I could.  I would be inclusive rather than exclusive, encouraging rather than discouraging, and loving rather than hateful.  I would show gratitude often, and I would take gracefully from those who wished to give to me, while giving wholeheartedly to those who were willing to take from me.  The Christmas Spirit is a spirit that we can adopt for every day of our lives if we choose to do so, and I hope that one day, I'll regularly be treating others as kindly in May or August as I do in December.  The Spirit I share is my choice, after all, and I'd like it to be a caring, loving, compassionate spirit all the time.

Quiet Afternoons--A Paragraph a Day

It's really quite fascinating to me just how nice quiet afternoons at home have become for me.  There was a time when I wanted to be out doing something, when I wanted to be active, when I felt I was wasting my time if I wasn't actually doing something.  But these days, some of my most pleasant moments come when I choose to stay home in the afternoon and read or play chess or color or draw or write.  I still love being active and doing things, but I've reached a point at which balance is very important, too, and I really like being at home, doing nothing, while outside the world keeps going on and on without me playing an active role in it.  I wouldn't want to do it all the time, of course, as I'm sure the charm would wear thin, but as long as I do balance staying in on a quiet afternoon and just relaxing with the other approaches to life that I tend to take, then I'll be fine.  Such afternoons stir appreciation for the home I have to relax in, for the money I have to maintain the home and my lifestyle, for the opportunity even to just slow down and be for a few hours.  It's a privilege that not everyone in the world is able to enjoy.  Quiet afternoons can give us some of our best moments if we can be sure to actually enjoy and appreciate them without feeling that we should be doing something else.