An Annual Shift in Thinking--A Paragraph a Day

It's December 27th, which means that it's time for us to start thinking about the new year coming up, and to start thinking of things like New Year's resolutions, things we want to accomplish in the coming year, habits we want to leave behind here in the old year. . . simply a multitude of thoughts about who we want to be in the coming year versus who we have been in the current year.  Most of us look to make changes, with the assumption that changes are necessary.  We want to go into the coming year and make ourselves "better."  But in what ways are we lacking?  Yes, we all can improve in certain ways, but do we absolutely need to?  Are we not good enough as we are?  I know that I always look for areas in which I can improve, but I rarely consider making a New Year's resolution such as "continue being kind," or "keep on loving other people."  I think that what I would really like to see happen is to have the thoughts that we feel during Christmas--"What would make this person happy?" or "What can I give that will truly make a difference?"--follow us into our New Year's resolution moments so that we can resolve to be kind and loving and compassionate for an entire year, to as many people as possible.  If we would be able to do this and actually follow through on the resolutions, what a great world we could make!

Sometimes Things Come Crashing--A Paragraph a Day

I find it important to keep in mind that things like holidays can be catalysts, and not always in a good way.  This year, for example, I've experienced a great deal of loss in several different ways.  And while I'm not dwelling on the losses, once Christmas comes around, I've found that those things come back to me very quickly and very forcefully, even though I didn't know exactly what was happening.  It wasn't like I was focusing on the loss and therefore became miserable--rather, I started feeling very strange, and only after a little while did I realize exactly why I was feeling the way I was.  And if this can happen to me, then I can only imagine how other people are feeling about their own losses, many of which have been much more drastic than those I've experienced.  It's a good reminder to me to show compassion all that I can, and to withhold judgment about why people are feeling the things they feel, and reacting the ways they're reacting.  I can do much more good in the world understanding people more than I judge them, and there's nothing like a bit of my own pain to remind me just how much pain other people are feeling, usually solely as a result of outside forces.  I don't want to be the person who judges someone else and therefore decides to be judgmental rather than compassionate; I really want to be the person who shows compassion and thus helps someone else to work their way through problems they're experiencing, and there are very few teachers more effective than my own pain and loss to help me to understand the pain and loss that other people are feeling.  It's important to mourn and grieve when we feel our own loss, and it's also important to try to understand the lessons that our pain and loss are teaching us, even as we're going through the misery that we feel.  If we learn from our loss, it's a much better thing than if we just feel sorry for ourselves.

Christmas Eve--A Paragraph a Day

I really love Christmas, but I think I like Christmas Eve even better.  When Christmas Day comes, here it is, and we're in the midst of it.  And that's fine--I do my best to enjoy myself.  But when Christmas Eve is here, there's still a whole lot of anticipation in the air, the looking forward to things.  It's like having a wonderful holiday on a cozy evening full of beautiful lights and trees and music and egg nog and whatever else makes Christmas Eve for you--and still having something wonderful to look forward to.  Anticipation--looking forward to something--can be just as amazing as having experiences.  As A.A. Milne tells us in Winnie-the-Pooh,

“Well," said Pooh, "what I like best," and then he had to stop and think. Because although Eating Honey was a very good thing to do, there was a moment just before you began to eat it which was better than when you were, but he didn't know what it was called.”

Every year, I love Christmas Eve.  Oddly enough, I married a woman whose birthday is on Christmas Eve, so the day is even more special now.  Christmas is wonderful, but Christmas Eve is even better, according to me.  And it's great that way--I don't have to view the holiday in the same ways that everyone else views it!

Little Ones--A Paragraph a Day

I sometimes get a bit pessimistic about humanity when I read the news and see all the awful things that human beings do to each other just because they believe different things or have different color skin or live in a different area.  It's difficult to constantly see such cruelty and lack of respect for one another, but life is what it is, right?  And we have to deal with it, don't we?  But one thing that keeps me hopeful about human beings is making sure that I continue to have contact with young people, and that's where my teaching comes in.  I deal with lots of high school students who are kind and considerate and who want to make the most of their lives but don't want to step all over other people in order to do so.  I have students who really do want to learn, and who do everything they can in order to do so.  And my wife works with even younger kids--the twins she nannies will be four in a couple of months.  She told me that today, the girl asked her to help her write a Christmas card for her parents.  And without any prompting, this is what she told my wife she wanted to write to her mom:  "Thank you so much for always taking care of us," and she wanted to say the same thing to her dad, but adding:  "and always being there when mommy is away."  The fact that a four-year-old can think that way fills me with not just admiration, but also hope--there have to be more kids just like her in the world, and one day I hope that they're in charge.  And then things will be much, much better than they are now.

A Break--A Paragraph a Day

Finally, Christmas break is here.  For most non-teachers, I'm sure this break that we get for Christmas--as well as the more significant break that we get in the summer--seems to be a bit excessive.  After all, we get more than a week off (at this school--other places get two weeks, and colleges get up to four!), which is something that most other people don't get unless they take vacation.  But for me, this vacation is an absolutely necessary element of teaching, and one that if they took it away, I probably wouldn't be able to teach any more.  I suppose this is one way that relativity is obvious--the level of exhaustion that people experience in their jobs is relative--I've had jobs that don't take nearly as much out of me as teaching does, and I haven't really felt any need at all for vacations.  As a high school teacher, though, my levels of exhaustion are much, much higher.  And as I imagine things, my level of exhaustion isn't anywhere near the level that an elementary school teacher reaches constantly, being the main teacher and caretaker for up to 30 or 40 very young children all day, every day.  I love the breaks I get, though, and for the next ten days or so I'm going to do everything I can to relax and recover so that when we start back up, I'll be ready to go until the next break, giving all that I can to try to help a bunch of young people learn certain things that they're supposed to learn.  If I make the most of a break, then I'm helping out the people I'll be in direct contact with after the break, for I'll be much more effective then.  If I didn't get the break, my effectiveness would continue to diminish until it eventually would simply disappear.  So the next time you get a break, don't feel guilty about it, but make sure that you take the time to rest and recover, for the people you deal with after you're back from your break will much appreciate the fact that you've rested and helped yourself to become more patient, more compassionate, and more effective.

Amazing Gifts--A Paragraph a Day

I got a great birthday present today.  It's a giraffe that's made out of beads.  It's about seven inches tall, and when you press the button below the base that it's standing on, it kind of collapses until you let go of the button, and which point it stands up straight once again.  It's special because it was given to my by a pair of twins who aren't even four years old yet, but who found it in their hearts to send a gift home for me with my wife, who works with them during the day.  I've met them a couple of times, and even helped my wife babysit them once, but I never expected that at their age, they would be interested in sending me a birthday present--and even give up one of their own possessions to do so.  It's kind of overwhelming in a way, but in a very, very good way.  They're very kind little kids, and it gives me a lot of hope to see two kids so young thinking about giving something to someone else instead of keeping it themselves.  They gave me something straight from their hearts, and it definitely touches me deeply in my own heart.  Perhaps this is what people mean when they say "heart to heart"?  I'm not sure of the original meaning of the expression, but it certainly works here.  And the only appropriate response to such an amazing display of generosity is gratitude, mixed with more than a bit of happiness when two very little kids find someone to be so important to them that they're willing to sacrifice their attachment to a special toy of this and pass it long to someone like me.  Two less-than-four-year-olds made my whole birthday brighter with something straight from their hearts, and I would be hard-hearted indeed not to acknowledge just how special that is!

What Does Christmas "Spirit" Mean?--A Paragraph a Day

I love the idea of Christmas Spirit, but I'll be the first to admit that I don't know what the term actually means.  It's probably one of those things for which we have the standard kind of answer--"it means something different for everyone"--but it would be nice if we could define it and understand it clearly.  Not because I'm the type of person who needs and wants to have everything catalogued and defined according to a certain set of criteria, but because it seems to be such a positive concept, one that can bring us true joy if we knew how to access it, or harness it, or adopt it.  After all, the Spirit of Christmas would have to include a love of giving, and it would have to include a love for virtually everyone.  It would exclude everything like greed and selfishness, and it wouldn't have anything to do with judgment or bias.  I think that if I want to go out and model the Spirit of Christmas, I would have kind words for everyone I met, and I would be as generous as I possibly could be, given my means.  I wouldn't treat others with harshness, and I wouldn't make them feel that I didn't approve of them for any reason.  If I were to model Christmas Spirit, I would listen carefully when others talked, and I would encourage them as much as I could.  I would be inclusive rather than exclusive, encouraging rather than discouraging, and loving rather than hateful.  I would show gratitude often, and I would take gracefully from those who wished to give to me, while giving wholeheartedly to those who were willing to take from me.  The Christmas Spirit is a spirit that we can adopt for every day of our lives if we choose to do so, and I hope that one day, I'll regularly be treating others as kindly in May or August as I do in December.  The Spirit I share is my choice, after all, and I'd like it to be a caring, loving, compassionate spirit all the time.

Too Much--A Paragraph a Day

Some of my students today told me that another teacher of theirs had assigned them to read a rather long novel over the Christmas break and to write a letter based on that book.  I told them in all seriousness that they should ask that teacher if he understands what "break" means.  We take breaks for a reason, because we're tired and we need to renew and rejuvenate ourselves.  I've known far too many teachers over the years, though, who really have no respect for students' need to actually take a break from school and to be able to spend some time not worrying about assignments or readings or anything school related.  The Christmas break is the perfect time to allow students to unwind and to allow the material we've covered all fall to sink in, to allow their minds to process things that need to be processed without placing any more academic demands on them.  I never have any guilt taking a break, because I know that in the long run, my breaks are going to be make me far more capable of accomplishing what I need to accomplish than working myself to exhaustion or frustration would make me.  I feel very bad for the students, and I also feel bad for people who will never take breaks from their jobs or their families or other obligations.  Rest is sometimes much more useful in many ways than continued effort is, and once we learn this lesson,  we can make our lives more restful AND more productive, and I hope to never deprive myself of rest when it's genuinely needed.

Being an Observer--A Paragraph a Day

The next week or so promises to be rather challenging for many people who live in countries where they celebrate Christmas.  After all, there are tons of parties and get-togethers and secret Santas and gifts to buy and people to visit and foods to eat and expectations and hopes that all seem to come together in the week before Christmas.  One of the things that I do to cope with the extra stress of the next couple of weeks is to take a step back and doing my best to become an observer, someone who watches everything happen but who makes no judgments and who doesn't take anything that happens personally.  A crummy gift from that person?  Interesting, but no big deal.  Completely forgotten by that other person?  That is interesting, but what can I learn from it?  When we observe, we learn.  We listen carefully and closely to other people instead of focusing on speaking.  We see other people's fears and triumphs and nervousness and actions, and we learn a lot about who those people are by seeing what they do at Christmas time.  I think we have too many judges around the holidays, anyway--no one needs me to be another judge of who they are and what they do.  When I observe, I can notice who needs help and offer it.  I can see who's being neglected and possibly put a candy bar on their desk.  I can see who's feeling overwhelmed and spend a few minutes talking to them so that they can vent and put their feelings into words, and possibly deal with things better then.  I do participate in Christmas--it's not like I pull myself out of it completely.  But I don't get caught up in the drama or the conflict or some of the other silliness.  Rather, I do my best to try to see what I can so that I can do what I can to contribute to making the season more bearable for those people who may be having a hard time.  This way, I just may be able to contribute something other than just presents and egg nog and cookies.

Christmas--A Paragraph a Day

Every year I have to ask myself why I like Christmas so much, and I never come up with a satisfactory answer.  It isn't for religious reasons, because the holiday really has gone far past its religious roots, and if my focus were on religion, I'd probably dislike the holiday more than I like it.  It isn't for the gift-giving, because that seems to have gone over the top for most people, becoming more like a competition to give the best gift or a way to buy other people's love and affection.  I think that the bottom line for me is that it's a season when so many people are thinking of others more than they're thinking of themselves.  Our focus shifts from inward (which is very often very positive) to outward, and we're more concerned with the other people in our lives than we are in ourselves.  In my family this was rarely the case--we spent most of our holidays hoping that dad wouldn't go out drinking on the 23rd and not come home until the 26th or 27th.  Our holiday thoughts weren't on what we could do for others, but what we hoped wouldn't happen to us.  Since then, though, I've come to see Christmas more as Scrooge's nephew sees it in a book that I read every Christmas, starting on my birthday on the 20th:  "I am sure I have always thought of Christmas time, when it has come round—apart from the veneration due to its sacred name and origin, if anything belonging to it can be apart from that—as a good time; a kind, forgiving, charitable, pleasant time; the only time I know of, in the long calendar of the year, when men and women seem by one consent to open their shut-up hearts freely, and to think of people below them as if they really were fellow-passengers to the grave, and not another race of creatures bound on other journeys. And therefore, uncle, though it has never put a scrap of gold or silver in my pocket, I believe that it has done me good, and will do me good; and I say, God bless it!"  I think that Dickens definitely hit the nail on the head there, and I know that I will always love Christmas for just that reason.  Here's hoping that your Christmas, too, is a wonderful one!

Enough is Enough--A Paragraph a Day

To know when you have enough is to be rich.    -Lao-tzu

I've been reading a bit about wealth and materialism and happiness recently, and I think that most of the many words that I read could be summed up in these ten words from Lao-Tzu.  Really, enough is enough, and most of us are convinced somehow that we never really do have enough, and that we always need more.  That's not true, though--outside of food to eat, shelter from the elements, and clothing, none of us truly need all that much.  Most of us who are privileged enough to be accessing the Internet with a computer or phone already have much more than enough, yet we continue to convince ourselves that we need more somehow, some way.  If I want to be truly rich, though, I don't need to have more money or more material possessions; rather, I simply need to be satisfied with what's already in my life.  I have enough clothes, I have enough food, I have more than sufficient shelter.  I have more books than I need, more computers than I need, more furniture than I need--this list is pretty long.  So when all is said and done, I'm extremely wealthy, aren't I?  I know that I'm much wealthier than probably 90% of the people who have ever lived on this planet, so why don't I consider myself wealthy?  Perhaps because my society tells me in many ways that if I truly want to consider myself wealthy, I need to have more possessions, and more expensive possessions.  I don't buy that, though, so society be damned--I'm very wealthy, and I'm very appreciative of the wealth that I possess.  Enough is enough, and I definitely have more than enough.

No Run Today--A Paragraph a Day

When I looked out the window at work a little bit before I came home, I saw snow falling sideways--the wind was strong enough to blow it parallel to the ground.  And I realized that today wasn't a day for a run, for even though I do like running in snow, the wind makes a huge difference in the quality of a run.  And I figure now that since I wrote yesterday about running on a cold day, it might be a good idea today to write about not running on a cold day that goes past cold into bitter.  I've learned that much of what it means to live life fully has to do with discernment, with choosing the right times to do things, but also choosing the right times not to do things.  I would have loved to have run today, but some days are for rest, not for workouts.  I know too many people who don't understand that idea, or who choose to ignore it, and they run themselves into the ground because they don't give themselves rests, especially on days when it may not be just unpleasant to go out and do something, but may also be somewhat dangerous.  After all, our body temperatures do go down when it's cold outside, but they go down even more when it's cold and windy.  And while I love to run in the cold, I don't have any superpower that I know of that allows me to deal with a seriously low body temperature--sometimes our decisions need to be driven more by logic that tells us that something isn't safe than by emotion telling us we want to do something.  Hypothermia isn't pleasant and is potentially dangerous, so my goal for today is to be safe, and I think that the best thing that I can do is to avoid running.  Some days are just that way, and it's not a sign of weakness to decide not to do something like running on a day that's obviously bad for it--it's rather a sign of respect for ourselves and our bodies to recognize that conditions are far from ideal to do something, so the best thing that we can do is to decide not to do that something, just for now.

A Run in the Cold--A Paragraph a Day

I went for a run after work today, even though the temperature was only about 37 degrees.  That was fine with me, though--with long sleeves and running pants and a nice warm hat, I practically didn't notice the temperature at all.  That's the way it usually is with a run after work on days like this--I don't feel like going outside because it's cold and my home is nice and warm and cozy, but I force myself to do so anyway.  And once I get out there, I enjoy it a lot.  Some of the best runs of my life have come on days when I would have preferred not to run at all due to weather conditions.  But I've run anyway, and it's been great.  It often makes me wonder what else in my life I might have been avoiding, and that I might have missed because it seemed like it might be unpleasant.  It's so easy for us to slip into comfort mode, to look around ourselves and say, "This is nice right here and right now--there's no need to do anything else."  The thing is, though, that running is the activity that most contributes to my good health, and if I don't do it, I gain weight and I lose fitness.  I'm not a fanatic about fitness, but I do want to stay healthy, and running is an important part of that.  What else could I be enjoying in life because I think it might be a bit unpleasant?  What am I avoiding that I should be searching out and enjoying?  I'm definitely not always the best judge of what's best for me, and it may be worth my while to start paying attention to things that I'm avoiding for some reason.  Who knows?  There's a chance that what I'm avoiding could be just what I need!  The run in the cold today was very enjoyable, even though it seemed that it wouldn't be.  What else is tricking me?

Children Inside--A Paragraph a Day

The most sophisticated people I know--inside they are all children.   -Jim Henson


It always astonishes me to see just how much we tend to value the things of adulthood and just how little we tend to value the things of childhood.  In my mind and in my heart, the things of childhood seem to be much more authentic, much more kind, much more interested in the world, much more human.  As adults we start to judge and to demand and to expect.  As children, we tend to wonder, to appreciate, to love, to hope.  We allow our minds to fly as we give ourselves wings to think of things that aren't necessarily important to anyone else, while as adults we think in the ways we're "supposed" to think, and we allow our perspectives to be overwhelmed by the demands of society.  While being a child isn't necessarily something that we all want to do, I do find it a shame that we for some reason reject out of hand all the things of childhood when so many of those things could make for a very happy adulthood if we could only hold on to them.  I love feeling a sense of wonder when the snow is falling, and I love looking at a new person with no judgment at all--just the simple acceptance of another human being who is in my life.  We can all be children inside if we don't simply reject the things of childhood, and if we allow them to be an important part of who we are--and if we do so, our lives will be richer and more fulfilling.

Taking a Rest--A Paragraph a Day

One of the things that I like best in this world is a day when I don't have tons of obligations, when I can look at the weather report and see that we're supposed to be hit with a severe rainstorm that's going to last all day, and I can say to myself, "It's a rest day."  A day with heavy rain doesn't allow for many of the chores and tasks that I normally do around the house, so when it happens, I try to take advantage of the weather and do as little as I can on that day--and it's wonderful when it happens on a weekend.  After all, I spend the whole week working, and my normal tendency over the weekend is to get some work done here, stuff that I can't do during the week because I'm busy at work.  I don't feel that I overwork myself, because I actually enjoy doing many of the chores that I do around the house, but it is nice when nature tells me on a given day that I'm not going to be doing any tasks at all.  Of course, the temptation to do work online then comes up, but I've gotten pretty good at rejecting that sort of thing in favor of a nice nap or some time reading.  We all need rest--that's a given in life, non-negotiable--but many of us are reticent to take the rests when we have the opportunity to do so because we feel somehow guilty, like for some reason we should be doing some work on Saturday or Sunday afternoon simply because.  So I do my best to force myself to rest, to reject the temptation to do some online work in favor of lying down on the couch to nap for half an hour or so.  When we have the chance to rest, we should take it whenever it rears its head--otherwise we risk burning out, and then we won't be helpful to anyone at all in any way at all.

Three and a Half--A Paragraph a Day

I had a wonderful opportunity last night:  my wife and I babysat for two little kids, twins, who are three and a half years old.  My wife knows them very well, as she nannies for them three times a week, but I had met them only twice in passing, so I didn't know them as well.  But for me, the chance to spend a few hours with a couple of little kids is always a wonderful opportunity.  And we did have a wonderful time.  We played hide-and-seek, we drew pictures, we ate dinner, we talked, my wife and I read to them--it was simply a great time.  Tiring, a bit, but great.  Little kids, if we treat them well, have so much to teach us.  They enjoy life for exactly what it is, they show their joy, they express themselves honestly (such as at bedtime, when the girl wanted her mommy because she wasn't used to going to bed without her mother around).  Her crying didn't last long, though, because she found something better to do--reading to her dolls in bed, until she fell asleep.  To me, time spent with little ones is always a blessing, especially when they're really nice little kids (and most are) as these were.  I read to the boy until he couldn't hold his head up any longer, then my wife carried him to bed, where he crashed.  If you ever want to reset things, to see the world in a different way, to feel more of the love of and passion for life, do yourself a favor and spend a little time with a very little kid, and don't try to order the kid around--let them be who they are, and learn from who they are rather than trying to make them learn what you think they should learn.

Youthful Decisions--A Paragraph a Day

Working with young people, I'm constantly faced with certain frustrations.  If I could teach them anything that I think might help them to lead happy and fulfilling lives, high on my list would be the art of decision-making.  What I see in the kids of today is often an inability to make decisions that will prove to be helpful to them, or positive for them.  Of course, there have been kids making bad decisions for all of history--they're still young and they usually don't have the experience behind them that would help them to understand how to weigh their options before making important decisions.  In fact, they often don't have the experience necessary to even understand or recognize their options.  If they've had good teachers in their lives, they're usually a bit better prepared for decision-making, but it seems that these days they have less positive adult input in their lives than they used to.  This lack of connection with older people who could be passing on their knowledge and wisdom is a great detriment to the young people, who tend to get most of their "learning" from screens these days.  Unfortunately, the screens can't help them when some sort of dilemma arises, and the lack of previous learning from the people who used to be role models often keeps them from making decisions that are positive and helpful to them in their lives.  I do my best at school to teach them how to look at things in ways that will help them to make good decisions, but the deck seems to be stacked against them in many ways.  So if you see any young people who seem to be making really bad decisions, don't be too upset with them.  Rather, it may do them--and you--a great deal of good to try to help them to understand the importance of decision-making, and help them to develop a process of their own to come to decisions that will help them to build their lives rather than sabotage them.

What Came before--A Paragraph a Day

I'm teaching Spanish now, and unfortunately, many of the students have a very difficult time of learning the language.  One of my classes is Spanish 3, and one of the things that I find out rather consistently is who the students had for their Spanish 1 teacher.  Many of the students took Spanish in middle school, and many of them had a certain teacher who I know demands almost nothing of his kids in class.  His own Spanish is rather mediocre, and he's happy just to throw a worksheet or two at the kids to keep them busy for the time they happen to be in his classroom.  And I get them in my classes later, in high school, only to find that they're sorely lacking in the knowledge and skills that they really should have if they want to study Spanish 3.  I have to be lenient, though, because I know that their learning was sabotaged by a teacher who didn't challenge them or guide them through the process of learning the early steps of this particular language.  And I try to remember that I could apply this approach to almost everyone in every situation--someone could be bad at relationships because of what came before; someone else could constantly say inappropriate or insensitive or even rude things because of what came before, another person could be afraid of taking risks or taking on challenges because of what came before.  If I maintain my sensitivity and compassion, I can refrain from judging people harshly because I usually have no idea what came before, and my harsh judgment now may end up being "what came before" later, when they would be much better off having memories of my helpfulness and encouragement, and my efforts to help them to learn and perhaps even make up for some of the time they lost with what came before.

Intentions--A Paragraph a Day

Christmas is a good time for me to reflect on intention--why do I want to do the things I want to do during the holiday season?  I want to give certain gifts to certain people, of course, but is that because I care for them and want to do something nice for them, or because I want to be thanked or seen in a different light by the recipient or other people who know I've given the gift?  My wife and I regularly buy gifts for families that have signed up with organizations that help to match gift donors with needy families, and it's important to ask ourselves if we're doing that because we want to feel better about ourselves, or because we want to provide a few nice Christmas gifts to some kids who otherwise might not get anything?  Of course, the answer is pretty much always the latter, but I think it is worthwhile to at least ask ourselves the question about our motivation so that we can be sure that we're doing things for the right reason.  When talking about getting gifts for kids who may not get anything otherwise, I'm sure that even if there are some selfish motives, the fact that the gifts are being given makes it a good thing anyway, so there's no problem even if the motive isn't simply giving.  But if we get into giving to make ourselves feel better or to impress other people, then it's pretty sure that we're in for some sort of disappointment because people generally don't act in the ways we want or expect them to act.  My main goal, though, is to make sure that I can feel a clear conscience when I know that my desire to give gifts isn't at all motivated by what I may get back in return, and that I can completely forget the fact that we gave what we gave, knowing that it's now in the hands of the person or people it was meant to be in.

Getting Ready for the Holidays--A Paragraph a Day

One thing that I've learned over the years is that it's necessary for me to do things early during the holiday season if I'm going to enjoy the season for all that it's worth.  I have to get gifts early, I have to get them wrapped, and I have to get the gifts and the cards mailed very early.  What I've learned is that it's much nicer to sacrifice some time in early December than it is to be stressed out near Christmas.  It's one of those trade-offs that is more than worth it--I lose a few hours of what could be productive or restful time early in the month, but when Christmas does show up, I'm done with all that I need to do, and I can relax and enjoy sitting around and drinking egg nog and reading A Christmas Carol.  I don't have to worry about gifts or deadlines or stores that are out of what I need.  I don't have to do any last-minute shopping, and I can help others with things that they may need to have done.  Sometimes life becomes easier when we're willing to sacrifice something today to make for a better tomorrow.  One of the times that I've found illustrates this point very well is the Christmas season.  If I'm willing to spend some time early in the month making the lists I need to make and doing what the lists ask me to do, then I can have a holiday that's relaxing and stress-free, and surprisingly enjoyable!  I'm not extremely good at it yet, but I'm working on it--the holiday season gets less and less stressful each year that it comes, because I'm getting better at meeting it on my terms, and taking care of things earlier rather than later.

Heart or Brain?--A Paragraph a Day

Sometimes I think too much with my brain, and not enough with my heart.  Actually, I take that back--it's not sometimes.  Almost always, I think too much with my brain, and not enough with my heart.  I try to approach things logically, I try to figure things out, I try to come up with solutions.  I'm not as bad as it as I used to be--as an Adult Child of an Alcoholic, I grew up with some pretty extreme issues concerning control of situations--but I still do it far more than I'd like, or even than I'd like to admit.  I've grown up trusting my brain to work its way through virtually everything, rather than allowing my heart to let me know that some things are just fine the way they are, and I don't need to spend any effort trying to "fix" them.  My heart accepts others more quickly and more fully than my brain does, and it appreciates some of the blessings of my life more fully than my brain does.  My brain likes to find fault with things, and it likes to find ways to improve them; my heart accepts and appreciates things as they are, and it allows them to be just what they are without change, and it helps me to show that appreciation and love much more than my brain does.  I know that people in my life have been affected by me in many more positive ways when I've been following my heart rather than my brain, and one thing I truly want to keep doing is raising the percentage of time I allow my heart to be the dominant force in my life rather than my brain.  I'm a more caring and compassionate person when I do so.

Rainy Days--A Paragraph a Day

It's raining outside right now, and I love it.  I don't really feel a need or desire to go anywhere or do anything, so it's nice just to sit here on the couch and relax and write a few words.  The darkness outside makes the atmosphere in here more intimate, more welcoming, more comfortable, and I try to take advantage of that feeling by pulling a throw over me and doing something like this that doesn't require any physical output from me.  It's nice to rest, especially when the world outside is telling me that it's a good time to rest.  It makes it easier to do, and easier to enjoy.  I've always loved rainy days--sometimes I go running in the rain, sometimes I go for a walk, and sometimes I just sit inside and enjoy the coziness of being warm and dry while the weather is dark and cold.  I find that I'm often much more creative when the weather changes regularly--I've lived in places where it's been sunny for weeks at a time, and in those places I never really feel the creativity well up in me as it does in places like this.  Perhaps it's just my body going with the flow of the weather, with its ups and downs and highs and lows.  I feel very privileged to be able to spend rainy days inside a warm and dry home, and I hope to keep appreciating them for as long as I possibly can while I'm still here in this body on this planet.