Creating a Garden--A Paragraph a Day

When the world wearies and society ceases
to satisfy there's always the garden.   -William Affleck


It's the gardening time of the year again, and this year we have a new garden to try to make our own, as we have a new home.  It's a nice way to spend our time because we're doing work that we enjoy to add value--sentimental value, mostly--to the home that we live in.  Not only is it nice to look out at the pretty flowers and plants, but it's also somewhat fulfilling to use our energy and creativity to make the garden look nice and even feel nice.  We're working to create something that is alive and that contributes something positive to the world, aesthetically and naturally.  We're helping to provide pollen for the bees and beauty for the eye, and we get to contribute to the world by helping something else to grow and to live.  And of course, it gives us a wonderful metaphor for life--making our own lives better by helping others.  Service to others is what can help us to make our own lives worthwhile--we enrich ourselves by helping others, be they human or animal or plant, and we can at the same time make the world a slightly better place for others, too.

I Miss Cooperation--A Paragraph a Day

Efforts to reach out and engage others in dialogue with the aim
of fostering mutual understanding and bringing people closer
together may seem ordinary and unexciting, but they in fact
constitute a bold and daring challenge to create
a new era of human civilization.   -Daisaku Ikeda
   
   
It's tempting to say that things used to be better, but I can't be sure.  I think they were, but there's so much that I don't know that it's impossible for me to know definitely.  It seems to me, though, that people used to cooperate with each other more often and better.  We used to value working together whether we agreed with each other politically or religiously or ethically or not--cooperation was much more important than any petty differences that we had with each other.  When we work together, we're able to share ideas and support one another, and the finished result is pretty much always superior to any results that we might achieve on our own.  But these days we see so many people who absolutely refuse to work with anyone who doesn't think as they do and believe as they do, and the result is that we're seeing very little being achieved compared to what we used to achieve.  We spend much less time thinking about how to help one another and much more time trying to bring each other down, and that's simply a recipe for disaster.  For me, myself, my hope is that I'll always do what I can to cooperate with others so that I can both help them to be better and allow them to help me to be better.

This, Too, Shall End--A Paragraph a Day

One thing that I've learned over and over again about life is that no matter how unpleasant certain situations may get, they will be over, either sooner or later.  I've had plenty of negative times, and I've gone through a lot of very difficult situations, but the truth is that eventually, they've all ended.  Today, as a somewhat superficial example, I was on a long bike ride.  After about three and a half hours, I hit a situation that I wasn't expecting--the road basically went away, replaced by a terribly rocky, unrideable surface that forced me to walk my bike.  It was a difficult stretch, and very frustrating and annoying.  But I knew that if I left the annoying part overwhelm me, I wouldn't have as much fun on my ride.  And I knew from experience that no matter how difficult things got at the time, I would still be at home within about an hour, so I might as well enjoy my surroundings and the fact that I was able to get out for a ride for most of the morning.  By looking on the positive side and keeping in mind that the negative part wouldn't last forever, I was able to enjoy the time that I spent outdoors, getting a good amount of exercise and fresh air.  As a metaphor, of course, I can apply this reality to other situations, no matter how difficult they may be.  Things pass, and we move on to something else--and I hope that I'm always able to see the brightest side of everything.

Being Myself--A Paragraph a Day

By being yourself, you put something wonderful
in the world that was not there before.   -Edwin Elliot

Who am I?  How can I be myself when I'm in a society that asks me to be like everyone else?  When I teach, my evaluations have more to do with whether or not I'm doing the same things that all teachers are expected to do.  Gone are the days of academic freedom, of following your own muse and your own instincts.  Now the job is formulaic and teachers are expected to follow the formula faithfully.  Other jobs are very similar.  To be in certain clubs or organizations--including religions, of course--one must think and believe the same things as others.  So it makes it difficult to be ourselves sometimes, difficult to follow our own paths and be true to ourselves without compromising the integrity of our selves, of who we truly are in our depths.  I'm not sure that I know who I am exactly, but one thing that I'm sure of is that I'm going to do my best to put something positive and uplifting into the world that wouldn't be here if I weren't here to do my thing--not somebody else's thing, and not the thing that I'm told or expected to do.

Summer Break--A Paragraph a Day

When I was younger, it was easy to imagine that my teachers had a nice vacation every summer.  After all, it's a long time off, isn't it?  It's more than eight weeks straight, and most people are lucky to get a couple of weeks in a row.  Now that I'm a teacher, though, I understand just how necessary those breaks are, both for teachers and for students.  Learning takes a lot of work, and people--especially young people--get extremely burned out after eight or nine months of classes.  Right now, for example, we have a few weeks left of class and my students are having a hard time sticking with it.  My colleagues are all walking around exhausted, even though the year isn't quite over yet.  It makes it very clear to me just how important rest is in our lives--without it, we can pretty much never work to our full potential, and achieve the things that we need to achieve.  Rest is part of an important part of the balance between achieving and reinvigorating ourselves, and we need to make it part of who we are.  I have summer break coming up, and the most important part of it for me is using it to rejuvenate, to help myself to be a more effective teacher whenever I'm in the classroom.  I know what it's like to burn out, which is going to happen when we don't make sure that we rest, and I do everything I can to keep burnout at bay.  If we don't rest, we become less effective and less happy with who we are, so it's important that we be sure that we do rest when we have the chance to do so.

The Songs of Birds--A Paragraph a Day

There are very few things that to me are more pleasant to hear than the songs of birds.  And that seems quite strange, as the birds aren't singing to entertain or impress anyone with their musical ability--they're just doing what they do, and it sounds very nice to most of us.  Of course, you get your crows and ravens that make a less pleasant sound or two, but all in all the songs of birds are a beautiful part of life.  This fact gets me thinking, though, about the people I know.  What about their songs?  Am  listening closely to their songs and appreciating them?  Do they perhaps have songs as beautiful as those of the birds, but I can't hear them because I've pre-judged the people?  Perhaps because I don't expect beautiful songs from everyone, I don't hear many of the songs that could be absolutely wonderful.  I love to hear the birds singing, and perhaps there are many songs from many people that I could love just as much.  I'm going to try to keep my ears open and to hear the songs that so far I've been deaf to, songs that may enrich my life in ways that I can't even imagine now.  The birds do it all the time for me, and maybe it's time that I allow the people all around me to do so also.

Naps--A Paragraph a Day

I think that I'm kind of addicted to naps.  I don't take a whole lot of them, which I find to be a shame, actually, but they are one of the most important parts of my life.  I love laying down (or even just reclining) with the intent of sleeping for a little bit, closing my eyes and letting the world slip away for a few minutes.  I almost never sleep more than ten or fifteen minutes, but my naps add a wonderful element to my life.  They're easily one of my favorite things, as they help me to recharge in reinvigorate so that I can face the tasks I have to accomplish with more energy and a clearer mind.  As always, I find it wonderful that one of my favorite things in the world doesn't cost me a cent--it consists of simply closing my eyes and relaxing and letting sleep take over for a few minutes.  So much of life is like that--the truly important things, the truly wonderful things, generally don't cost us anything at all except a little time and perhaps a little effort.  When we grow to love the simple aspects of life that feel so amazing and that help us so much, then we can live our lives as grateful people who know the value of those simple things, and who are willing and able to appreciate them and recognize the value that they bring to our lives.

When I Get Impatient--A Paragraph a Day

Sometimes I get more impatient with other people than I'd like to get.  I like to think at times that I'm a little bit patient and a little bit kind, but it's rather easy for me to become impatient when other people do something that I see as mean or rude or even if my students aren't learning as quickly as I'd like them to.  The important thing for me to do at such times is to hold my tongue and not say or do anything that I may regret later.  This is a habit that I've adopted that has made my life much less stressful than it used to be, mostly because I've found out that usually when I get impatient, it's more due to my mood or my mental state than it is to the other person's actions or lack of actions.  By withholding my judgment and not allowing my impatience to cause me to do something stupid, I improve my life, lower my stress level, and create a reality for myself that is much more pleasant than it would be if I allowed my impatience to control me and make me do things I simply shouldn't do.  We have to keep in mind that our emotions are simply that--emotions--and we don't have to create actions that mirror those emotions.  When we're angry, frustrated, angry, or whatever, sometimes the best thing to do is to wait until the feelings pass until we act.

Glorious Days--A Paragraph a Day

Some days are just nice, weather-wise--temperatures are cool and comfortable, there's a slight breeze, the sun is shining but there are some beautiful clouds, birds are singing, and the world just seems to be a pleasant place all in all.  These are the days when it feels wonderful to be alive, and it's easy to feel energetic and full of life when our surroundings are so pleasant.  And while I remain fully aware that there are horrible things happening to many people on this planet, some days it's good to just enjoy our surroundings and allow our spirits to shine as we take advantage of the beauty and wonder of our corner of the world.  There will always be suffering, of course, and there will be other days when I do what I can to alleviate it on the level that I can, but on the glorious days, it's important to bask in the glory and enjoy them to the fullest, for they are gifts to us--and just as we hope that others will fully enjoy any gifts we give to them, we should fully enjoy the gifts that are given to us, in our own unique and special ways.

Being Too Tired--A Paragraph a Day

Some days are just fascinating--by the time I get home, especially on Fridays after long and strenuous weeks, I'm pretty much too tired to do anything of substance.  I often sit down on the couch and read, giving myself the rest I need, but still end up falling asleep during a movie or while I'm reading.  Sometimes I feel a bit guilty about this, wishing that I weren't so darned tired, but for the most part, I accept the condition for what it is--simple exhaustion.  It's important to me to recognize just when I'm exhausted because that's the time that I don't want to undertake anything strenuous, either mentally or physically.  I know that if I do take something on, I'm either going to do it very poorly or fail miserably at it, so it doesn't make a lot of sense to even try something.  I know that all the self-help gurus will tell you that it's all in your mind, that you can do whatever you set your mind to no matter what, but I must respectfully disagree with them--sometimes I'm just too tired, and the best thing that I can do is to rest and allow myself to fall asleep early and get enough sleep to recover.  Not every day must be a triumph--some of my nicest days have been those when I've rested or recovered from a lot of hard work.  Sometimes, it's okay to just be too tired, and there's no need to push things when you recognize that you're not in a good place to be pushing.

A Smile and a Wave--A Paragraph a Day

My wife and I just went for a walk, and as we were doing so, we passed a very young girl, about six or seven years old, standing by her mother's car as her mother was getting something out of the car.  I smiled and waved and said hello, and the little girl waved back.  To me, there are few things in life more pleasant than that.  It's very special when a young child is willing to acknowledge your existence and wave or say hello, and it always makes me feel good when a kid does so.  We were nothing special to the girl, just two adults walking by, but she took the time to return our greeting and acknowledge our presence in her life for that tiny moment in time.  It's no small thing, Dickens once said, when people who are so "fresh from God" love us, and I know that it's not.  It's not a small thing at all.  It's a very special thing, and I always appreciate it when the very young people on this planet share their smiles and their thoughts and ideas with us.  I hope it keeps happening because it really does make me feel good.  Of course, if I want it to happen so, then I need to make sure that I treat them well, too--after all, as the adult I have much more of a responsibility to be kind and caring to the young than they have to be kind and caring to me.  May I always fulfill that responsibility.


Very young children are not afraid to express what they feel.
They are so loving that if they perceive love, they melt into
love.  They are not afraid to love at all.  That is the description
of a normal human being.  As children we are not afraid of the
future or ashamed of the past.  Our normal human tendency is
to enjoy life, to play, to explore, to be happy, and to love.

Don Miguel Ruiz

In Memoriam--A Paragraph a Day

I love how some people affect us over the course of years, how they contribute to our lives in positive ways and help to make us feel better and stronger as we face the challenges that life brings to us.  They can contribute to our lives for very long periods of time, and then one day we find that they're here no longer.  One person who gave such strength to me was Roswitha, a woman in Germany who was more of a mother to me than my biological mother, who encouraged me and shared ideas with me and helped me out in many, many ways.  When I got married in New Hampshire, Roswitha flew over from Germany to be there.  My own parents, in Colorado, didn't come.  Neither did my brother or sister.  That's just the kind of family I come from.  It was a Godsend to me to meet someone who took over the role of mother, even though I lived in Germany for only three years.  We still talked on the phone a lot and exchanged letters (remember those?) until she passed on a couple of weeks ago.  I'm sad about it, but more relieved--she was suffering a great deal and was in a lot of pain.  I know what people mean when they talk of us being immortal, because Roswitha still lives on in my memory, just as strongly as she was in my memory when she was still alive.  And I'm glad of that.  I would have loved to have seen her one more time before she passed, but that wasn't to be.  In a way that's a good thing, for my last memories of her won't be of her being bed-ridden; rather, I think of her as healthy and vital.  I really am going to miss her, of course, but I'm very thankful for the memories that she left me with.  She was a wonderful woman who did everything she could to help people whose lives she touched, and I'm very, very glad that her life touched mine.

Struggling--A Paragraph a Day

I never expect my students to be perfect, to know everything that we've covered in class.  I do, however, expect them to learn and to be better at the topic at hand at the end of the year than they were at the beginning of the year.  I find, though, that many of my students struggle with certain topics, but even as they struggle, they're unwilling to give extra time of effort to learn it better.  They seem to have the idea that if they just show up to class, they'll learn the material without making any effort at all, and I can guarantee you that that is definitely not the case.  If we want to learn anything, it takes work.  I don't make my classes extremely difficult, as that would defeat the main purpose of being there (learning), but I do make them rigorous so that the students learn, but the only people who aren't going to pass the classes are those who don't put forth any effort.  And that's something that I strive constantly to teach the young people in my classes:  learning takes effort, and if we want to improve at something, we most definitely need to work at it.  It doesn't just happen, and we can't depend on someone to come along and take us under their wing and teach us everything we need to know.  When I struggle, I try to understand why it's happening and I try to figure out ways to take care of whatever the issue may be.  I just wish that I could teach more young people the importance of doing so.

A Day of Rest--A Paragraph a Day

I really wanted to go for a run or a bike ride today.  It was a beautiful afternoon when I finished work, and I could just imagine how nice it would have been to go out into the day and enjoy the weather and the warmth and the breeze.  Alas, it wasn't meant to be--my body was telling me that it was a rest day, a day when I should allow my body to recover from the runs and the bike rides of the past few days and weeks, and I've learned over the years to pay attention when it tells me such things so that I don't injure myself by carelessly running when my body was telling me it needed a rest.  So I stayed home and did some other things, and that was fine--our bodies need rest, especially when we use them regularly, and rest is an important part of any life lived fully.  Resting gives us a chance to reflect and to recover and to even build up some strength so that the next run (more than likely tomorrow afternoon) will feel even better.  Rest helps muscles to recover so that they don't hurt us the next time we run--without rest, we keep working our ways towards depletion, and that's not really a good place to be going.  So I respect the rests and my body's need for them, for I really do want to take care of this body that's been such a great gift to me for a very long time.

A Very Long Ten Days--A Paragraph a Day

It's been quiet here for a while.  It's pretty easy to explain--my wife and I needed to fly to Germany for a funeral of a very dear friend, and between preparations, the actual travel (with time change and being very busy), and recovery (including catching up on work that I missed), our time has been a bit short for the last ten days or so.  And that's okay--a paragraph a day is simply a goal for something that isn't going to affect anyone drastically if it isn't met.  I love doing the writing and the thinking involved with it, but it's important to remember that sometimes life is going to change itself up rather dramatically and force us to do something else than that which we've planned.  Though we would like to be consistent and though we would like life to unfold in completely predictable ways, it's not going to happen like that.  And it would have been a bit silly of me to try to fit in these paragraphs over the last ten days, for there was simply too much else going on that needed my attention.  And that's okay.  The funeral is over and we're at home and life is getting back into a bit of a groove, so there's plenty of time now (for the time being, at least) for doing the things that got pushed to the side.  In the Tao Te Ching, there's a strong focus on letting the Tao lead us through life rather than trying to be at the controls, and I do respect that perspective.  So I'm going to try to follow life's lead and do the things that life calls me to do, even if it means putting aside something that I do feel is rather important.  Life knows better than I do, after all.